We have crossed into an Unreality

We have crossed into an Unreality.

At some point in the past year, we diverged. We diverged from our most likely, expected timeline and veered off into the foggy, nonsensical abyss in which we now find ourselves. And it does not feel real.

Life does not feel real anymore.

I’m not speaking figuratively here. This is not an emotional reaction to the state of affairs, my unwillingness to accept what has happened in our world to this point. That is not what I’m saying or implying.

I am saying life does not feel real anymore.

I look at people, and no longer believe they’re really there. I drive my car and don’t feel like it’s me who is driving. I look down at my hands and don’t feel like I’m the one moving them. There is a Fog, a disconnect, an interference permeating this reality, a split-shadow, a dissonance that may be growing stronger. Everything is off. By just a bit, but enough to be noticed.

I no longer believe reality.

What is this in front of me? Why does it feel so foreign? Tables don’t even make sense anymore. I will die someday, sure, and I don’t know what happens after that point, okay, but what is this?

What the hell are these cars and traffic lights and gas stations and buildings and stairs and trees and chipmunks? What the hell is all this? I don’t know what it is and I don’t believe it.

The Fog of the Unreality is strong.

The absurd becomes increasingly normalized and the mundane becomes unbelievable. I can’t focus even on the smallest things. I go out and do things and live my life and nothing seems real, nothing is convincing me of its existence. There is a clarity of thought I once knew that the Fog will not let me reach. Nothing makes sense, nothing lines up.

We have crossed into an Unreality.